Wrapped Up in the Recession

In college I wrote a column about sex and money. Like every nascent sex columnist I was interested in exploring the relationship between the two and how both inversely seemed to affect our love lives. My theory at the time was that those gifted in either area stood to gain most easily in the other. Rich guys can afford the highest class of escorts or attract gold-diggers, and those deemed sexy and desirable have been proven to more successful on average in any industry. But in these trying economic times, do these standards still apply? Has income and appearance become more or less relevant?

According to this article in The Week last week, condom sales are up, suggesting that people are having more sex, or at least being more cautious about it, but that most people who earn $75,000 or less reported that they thought they’d be having less sex in 2009. It seems obvious that people will want to take extra precautions in uncertain times, especially against the prospect of a costly, unwanted pregnancy, but what does this mean for the homos?

Not needing any other kind of birth control, and well aware that condoms are available at pretty much every gay venue in New York, will the recession effect us in similar ways? And the bigger question seems to be, why would those people in the lower income brackets predict that they would be having less sex, when it is possibly one of the most entertaining thing one can do for free? Ideally it would seem that we’d recognize our common need for fun and lovin’ and be more willing to couple up so we’d have someone to stay in with consistently, rather than going out to spend our money at bars looking for a one night stand.

But it all comes back to what I already knew in college; sex and money are intrinsically tied in a hierarchy of power that doesn’t fluctuate with the Dow Jones. Especially in turbulent times we want a partner that makes us feel secure and stable in all aspects of our lives, including of course our finances. A recession may lead to a brief outbreak of hedonistic or apocalyptic-esque sexual behavior, but ultimately our desire for normalcy will outweigh our wanton attitude towards sex and a partner who can help us maintain the lifestyle we’d become accustomed to will prevail.

Or perhaps we’ll choose to eschew dating all together. Lacking the funds to impress a potential mate, maybe we’ll turn solely to Manhunt encounters and meaningless bar tricks that don’t require us to treat for dinner or the movies. The recession could signal a pause of all romantic pursuit, and as indicated by the jump in sales at liquor stores, an era where we make love to the bottle before passing out each night. This picture portends to be a bit more bleak, but not altogether unrealistic.

Either road we choose to travel at this time will ultimately lead us back to where we’ve been. Eventually the economy will turnaround, the sugar daddies we acquired will lose their luster, as will the meaningless hook-ups. A renewed economy may not be the only answer to a stable relationship, but the peace of mind will surely help. Of course, love may still bloom in a stagnant market, but it will need to be more carefully nurtured than in times of prosperity. So grab some free NYC condoms and maybe together we can all fuck the pain and the recession away.

Posted originally on homo-neurotic.com on 2/24/09